So, few years back, I met a guy whom I really like only to find out that he was an INTROVERT – a direct opposite of the woman I am. You can tag me a chatty box or a hyperactive lady. I read with loud music – you know the kind that can almost make a deaf man hear…lol..
Anyways, I found it really daunting to understand him and this put our newly birthed relationship on hold for few weeks. This said guy wasn’t just an introvert but an introvert who has not been a relationship for six years. Oh Lord, where was I start from? I sat down, cracked my head, tried different approaches, read different personality novels and researched just to make the right move and I thank God I believe I am succeeding – oh yes, it has been an easy journey, everyday it’s one discovery or the other.
However, I know so many ladies out there are going through the same phase but worry less my 5 solution points will see you through.
Firstly, who is an Introvert? Contrary to what most people think, an introvert is not simply a person who is shy. In fact, being shy has little to do with being an introvert! Shyness has elements of apprehension, nervousness and anxiety, and while an introvert may also be shy, introversion itself is not shyness. Basically, an introvert is a person who is energized by being alone and whose energy is drained by being around other people.
Introverts are more concerned with the inner world of the mind. They enjoy thinking, exploring their thoughts and feelings. They often avoid social situations because being around people drains their energy. This is true even if they have good social skills. After being with people for any length of time, such as at a party, they need time alone to “recharge, here are a list of what you should understand when you are in a relationship with an introvert;
1. An introvert takes a while to open up to others
You need to have a lot of patience when talking to an introvert, they always need time to feel comfortable with you. Most introverts have been heartbroken-ed in relationships because their partners leave them for lack of understanding. Introverts need mental encouragement and most people do not give them that, show an introvert that you find them interesting and worthy of talking to, they will open up to you because of your support.
2. They require a lot of time alone to restore their energy
You need to respect their boundaries because they acquire energy from spending time in solitude, though, they don’t mind having fun and going places, they also need time to themselves so they can decompress and re-curate. Introverts put their self-care and self-love at a high priority so spending time alone allows them the chance to slow down and work on their mental and spiritual health. Don’t make them feel guilty or wrong for needing some space rather support them and understand that they can be a better partner to you if you allow them some time to recharge their batteries.
3. They love having deep, stimulating conversation
Introverts may not show off their conversation skills when you first meet them, but you should give them a chance to warm up to you. Introverts don’t like small talks, they enjoy conversations that teaches them something new or challenges their opinion.
4. They stay away from loud, crowded places
Introverts always avoid noisy and bustling places, they would rather spend their time out quietly to themselves and they do things in small doses. The hectic environment of most places tends to overwhelm their senses as they have a high sensitivity to stimuli.
5. They may have a hard time sharing their feelings with you
Introverts have a high sensitivity to energies and feelings and sometimes feel overwhelmed by the conflicting and turbulent frequencies in the world. An introvert might retreat into their shell from time to time, afraid of feeling too vulnerable, don’t pressure them if they don’t want to open up just yet, simply tell them they can talk to you whenever they feel the need to do so. This will show them that you support them but also care about hearing what they feel deep down inside. They just need someone to make them feel safe and loved, so offer this to them and they will eventually pour their heart out to you.
So my ladies, if you have an introvert man in your life now you know what to do. All they need is security, comfort, patience, understanding, commitment and lots of love. One more thing, never lie to them. *hugs&kisses*
In your heart!! In your head!! With my mic and my pen!!